Thursday October 30th. That is the next big date for us. Becca will have reconstruction done on her breast. All looks really good and the plastic surgeon has high hopes for a very nice outcome. The other breast augmentation to match the reconstructed one won't happen until next year after the other one heals and settles into the shape it will be. If that makes sense lol. Since chemo has been over there really hasn't been much to tell you all. Becca's hair is coming in more and more and her eyebrows are finally there. She's more platinum now than blonde but I think it looks great. It will be interesting to see what it looks like after it grows out.
I thought I'd catch you up on the financial aspect of this year. Yes it's taken it's toll and as long as the hospitals are willing to except payments then all will be fine in about 10 years lol. In all seriousness though I wanted to thank everyone who has helped. We really do have a lot of wonderful people in our lives and we can't wait to be able to pay it forward and help others. The turn out for the Brat Pit was wonderful however profits were lower than expected. I believe that was because of the last days derby format but I won't get into that. Still the proceeds will make a dent and we are very grateful!
I bring this up because it is the last time I am. We will leave the fundraiser going and see what happens but I had a hard enough time starting it and now it seems to have stalled and that's OK! Right now we are looking forward to the future and next summer when Becca will be healed, looking and feeling good. We are getting on with life, making plans, you know, normal stuff. I know there will be long periods of no posts but I promise anything of note I will be on here writing to let you all know.
Who knows, I may just keep this going. Letting anyone who wishes to peek into our lives in on what's going on. Xander started high school so I'm sure I'll have tons of stories to tell you over the next 4 years.
I think that in the end it's those whose lives you have touched that defines who you are and what you have accomplished in he short time we have here. All of you have touched our lives. No matter how small or how large of a way we thank you. And we look forward to continuing to define who we are by helping others. Take care of yourselves and those around you. Cherish the time you have and make the most of it. Till next time...
Monday, October 6, 2014
Sunday, September 14, 2014
We'll Stay On 19
Becca and I have made a decision about radiation. This post is about that and in her words because how can I express the thoughts in her head better than her. I have been her sounding board and have given my opinions on this but let's face it, it's her life and her body. Whatever she decided I would back her 100%. I am thrilled with the decision she made though :)
We got a second opinion from another radiation oncologist on Thursday who had basically the same opinion as the first radiation oncologist we saw: I'm in the grey zone; because of my age would like to overtreat instead of undertreat; I'm one of those cases where they just don't know if radiation is truly necessary after chemo was done first, and I went node positive to node negative (they don't even take pathology results into consideration because at this point they still treat based on initial diagnosis, but I could be part of a clinical trial that is trying to answer this very question. Same thing. About the same numbers.
Here's what it boils down to:
Right now, my chance of getting cancer again ranges between 10%-15% (one of the docs said closer to 20%, but I trust the one who was holding a medical book with actual numbers and graphs)
If I were to have radiation the number would decrease to about 5% or so.
On the other hand, if I had radiation, my chances of getting lymphedema ranges around 20%-30%. (One doc kind of poo-pooed it off, the other was pretty serious about it. "Radiation comes at a cost" is how she put it.) There are also major skin issues that could pop up, my reconstruction would not only be postponed to next summer, but the scar tissue created by the radiation could make the reconstruction more difficult and look less natural. Not to mention chances of developing other cancers, heart and lung issues, etc.
So, do the risks outweigh the benefits? What would you do?
Chris and I have been dwelling on this decision for weeks now. I think we've shed just as may tears over making the "right" choice as we did when I first found out about the carcinoma. Here's what we've decided.
No.
I'm done. No more.
Going from a 15% to a 5% chance just isn't enough for me to risk all of those side effects. If I had a 30% chance and it dropped down to 10%, then yes, by all means. This just isn't enough for me. I want to get on with my life! Chris equated it to blackjack and I can't remember exactly how he put it, but things have been going so well so far, we don't want to take the chance with the odds they are that the one last treatment that was supposed to make me better makes the rest of my life miserable.
I could be a part of the study, sure. It would help women in my situation in the future and I love that, but I want to make my own decision about what I do here. The outcome could be in my favor, but I also have an equal chance of having to go through radiation. Those are odds I don't like.
We don't know if cancer will rear it's ugly head again. I would have that chance whether I had the radiation or not, but in the meantime I know I'm feeling good, I'm happy and healthy. I'm going to be on hormonal therapy for the next 5-10 years to help suppress any possibly dormant cells from waking up, and I'm going to be taking such good care of myself and doing everything possible to try to prevent it - but who knows. And if it does come back, treatments advance in that field so quickly that perhaps they'll know more and have a better way to treat it.
Anyway, that's what we finally decided. Now I just have to grow the balls to call the doctor and say no thanks. I hope you all can understand this decision, but to us, the odds just aren't worth it.
Now, we can all move on, I can start my hormone therapy and schedule the completed reconstruction.
The blackjack reference has to do with the title of this post. She was dealt a 19 after chemo and surgery and unless you are 100% positive you can get a 2 on that next card odds are you're going to bust. We don't want her busting now do we?
We got a second opinion from another radiation oncologist on Thursday who had basically the same opinion as the first radiation oncologist we saw: I'm in the grey zone; because of my age would like to overtreat instead of undertreat; I'm one of those cases where they just don't know if radiation is truly necessary after chemo was done first, and I went node positive to node negative (they don't even take pathology results into consideration because at this point they still treat based on initial diagnosis, but I could be part of a clinical trial that is trying to answer this very question. Same thing. About the same numbers.
Here's what it boils down to:
Right now, my chance of getting cancer again ranges between 10%-15% (one of the docs said closer to 20%, but I trust the one who was holding a medical book with actual numbers and graphs)
If I were to have radiation the number would decrease to about 5% or so.
On the other hand, if I had radiation, my chances of getting lymphedema ranges around 20%-30%. (One doc kind of poo-pooed it off, the other was pretty serious about it. "Radiation comes at a cost" is how she put it.) There are also major skin issues that could pop up, my reconstruction would not only be postponed to next summer, but the scar tissue created by the radiation could make the reconstruction more difficult and look less natural. Not to mention chances of developing other cancers, heart and lung issues, etc.
So, do the risks outweigh the benefits? What would you do?
Chris and I have been dwelling on this decision for weeks now. I think we've shed just as may tears over making the "right" choice as we did when I first found out about the carcinoma. Here's what we've decided.
No.
I'm done. No more.
Going from a 15% to a 5% chance just isn't enough for me to risk all of those side effects. If I had a 30% chance and it dropped down to 10%, then yes, by all means. This just isn't enough for me. I want to get on with my life! Chris equated it to blackjack and I can't remember exactly how he put it, but things have been going so well so far, we don't want to take the chance with the odds they are that the one last treatment that was supposed to make me better makes the rest of my life miserable.
I could be a part of the study, sure. It would help women in my situation in the future and I love that, but I want to make my own decision about what I do here. The outcome could be in my favor, but I also have an equal chance of having to go through radiation. Those are odds I don't like.
We don't know if cancer will rear it's ugly head again. I would have that chance whether I had the radiation or not, but in the meantime I know I'm feeling good, I'm happy and healthy. I'm going to be on hormonal therapy for the next 5-10 years to help suppress any possibly dormant cells from waking up, and I'm going to be taking such good care of myself and doing everything possible to try to prevent it - but who knows. And if it does come back, treatments advance in that field so quickly that perhaps they'll know more and have a better way to treat it.
Anyway, that's what we finally decided. Now I just have to grow the balls to call the doctor and say no thanks. I hope you all can understand this decision, but to us, the odds just aren't worth it.
Now, we can all move on, I can start my hormone therapy and schedule the completed reconstruction.
The blackjack reference has to do with the title of this post. She was dealt a 19 after chemo and surgery and unless you are 100% positive you can get a 2 on that next card odds are you're going to bust. We don't want her busting now do we?
Thursday, September 4, 2014
No Longer Borg. Now a Water Balloon.
Hello there my little gumdrops! Been awhile huh? Sorry about that but it's been no news is good news around here. Time to catch you up on the little milestones and any news we may have for you. Ready....Set....
Drains! They are out. First one was out a week out after surgery. Second one took a little longer but was finally removed around the 19th. The second one was like foot long! I will say I won't miss emptying those. PT started on the 12th and After a lot of pain and a few frustrated tears shed I can now say she has almost full range of motion and is feeling tons better. Planning on going back to the office next week. She has been working from home but now she is confident driving and the docs have given her the ok. She still has a weight restriction but I think that will be lifted sooner rather than later.
We worked the Brat Pit at the walworth county fair and although Becca had to skip the last day I think she did really well. After sitting around for a month and then be up and working like that I was surprised she lasted the two days she did. Overdid it though and welcome back recliner heating pad and good ole Mr. Valium. This week we finally saw the Radiation Oncologist. I'm going to try my best to explain everything to you here but I'm sure I'll miss something.
Again she has the option to enter a trial. Created for people in her situation (the grey area) who could have radiation or not in the effort to ascertain if radiation after mastectomy should be the standard of care anymore. So she can participate in the trial and be randomized again.Then she would either have radiation or she wouldn't. She can just choose to have radiation or choose not to outside of the trial. There is an increased risk of lymphedema with radiation. Something like 15-20%. But with her type of cancer, and the fact that she is at the higher end of basically saying YES you NEED radiation, the recurrence rate is 12-15% after chemo.
Still he was impressed with her outcome from chemo and surgery. I could tell he was. And I think he should take this into account. She's 95.5% cured here. There is ALWAYS going to be a chance or the cancer returning because it's cancer. It's always going to be in the back of our minds. What we still want to know is IF she has radiation and takes on all the small risks as well as a bigger risk of lymphedema how much does that 12-15% drop? In my opinion if it's not down to less than 5% I'd say no way. But that's me. There is a reason they are doing this study in the first place. They have found that women like her don't necessarily NEED radiation and now they want to back that up. And they should. I just don't want her to risk it.
Add in the fact that she wants this over with. Radiation would postpone her reconstruction for as much as a year! Superficial I know. This is small potatoes when comparing the risk of death I know that too. But with where she is at I can't say I'd blame her. By the way for all you wondering the size will remain the same lol. Not for a lack of trying on my part mind you. I mean come on a free boob job? They can't charge us anymore this year so if she ever wanted bigger or smaller now would be the time to do it right? RIGHT? Help me out here!! Nah it's all good it's fine :) (seriously call and tell her bigger is better).
We have more literature to go through and will be talking with another oncologist today for a second opinion so we'll see where we are at the end of this week. If she decides on no radiation she will start taking her tamoxifen, a couple more fill ups and then then surgery. Oh yeah. The water balloon part of the title. Bet you thought I'd forgotten you silly gumdrop. I did. Sue me we gots nothin lol.
She had a tissue expander put in and filled initially with 150 CC's of fluid. Every week starting a few weeks back we going and they filler' up. Like a water balloon in her chest. They add CC's of saline to the point that the skin has stretched enough to accommodate the implant. Each fill up is 75-100 CC's depending on how the skin looks. Last one was 75 CC's. When the desired size is reached surgery would be scheduled.
Till next time er'body. Hope to have an answer on radiation with the next post and I will try to make it quick.
Drains! They are out. First one was out a week out after surgery. Second one took a little longer but was finally removed around the 19th. The second one was like foot long! I will say I won't miss emptying those. PT started on the 12th and After a lot of pain and a few frustrated tears shed I can now say she has almost full range of motion and is feeling tons better. Planning on going back to the office next week. She has been working from home but now she is confident driving and the docs have given her the ok. She still has a weight restriction but I think that will be lifted sooner rather than later.
We worked the Brat Pit at the walworth county fair and although Becca had to skip the last day I think she did really well. After sitting around for a month and then be up and working like that I was surprised she lasted the two days she did. Overdid it though and welcome back recliner heating pad and good ole Mr. Valium. This week we finally saw the Radiation Oncologist. I'm going to try my best to explain everything to you here but I'm sure I'll miss something.
Again she has the option to enter a trial. Created for people in her situation (the grey area) who could have radiation or not in the effort to ascertain if radiation after mastectomy should be the standard of care anymore. So she can participate in the trial and be randomized again.Then she would either have radiation or she wouldn't. She can just choose to have radiation or choose not to outside of the trial. There is an increased risk of lymphedema with radiation. Something like 15-20%. But with her type of cancer, and the fact that she is at the higher end of basically saying YES you NEED radiation, the recurrence rate is 12-15% after chemo.
Still he was impressed with her outcome from chemo and surgery. I could tell he was. And I think he should take this into account. She's 95.5% cured here. There is ALWAYS going to be a chance or the cancer returning because it's cancer. It's always going to be in the back of our minds. What we still want to know is IF she has radiation and takes on all the small risks as well as a bigger risk of lymphedema how much does that 12-15% drop? In my opinion if it's not down to less than 5% I'd say no way. But that's me. There is a reason they are doing this study in the first place. They have found that women like her don't necessarily NEED radiation and now they want to back that up. And they should. I just don't want her to risk it.
Add in the fact that she wants this over with. Radiation would postpone her reconstruction for as much as a year! Superficial I know. This is small potatoes when comparing the risk of death I know that too. But with where she is at I can't say I'd blame her. By the way for all you wondering the size will remain the same lol. Not for a lack of trying on my part mind you. I mean come on a free boob job? They can't charge us anymore this year so if she ever wanted bigger or smaller now would be the time to do it right? RIGHT? Help me out here!! Nah it's all good it's fine :) (seriously call and tell her bigger is better).
We have more literature to go through and will be talking with another oncologist today for a second opinion so we'll see where we are at the end of this week. If she decides on no radiation she will start taking her tamoxifen, a couple more fill ups and then then surgery. Oh yeah. The water balloon part of the title. Bet you thought I'd forgotten you silly gumdrop. I did. Sue me we gots nothin lol.
She had a tissue expander put in and filled initially with 150 CC's of fluid. Every week starting a few weeks back we going and they filler' up. Like a water balloon in her chest. They add CC's of saline to the point that the skin has stretched enough to accommodate the implant. Each fill up is 75-100 CC's depending on how the skin looks. Last one was 75 CC's. When the desired size is reached surgery would be scheduled.
Till next time er'body. Hope to have an answer on radiation with the next post and I will try to make it quick.
Friday, August 8, 2014
She Is Borg?
The title may catch a few (or more than a few) of you off guard saying "huh"? You'll understand in a minute. Continuing from my last post I got a call from her around 10am the next morning saying that she was visited by three ghosts, the first, arriving at midnight,er, wait wrong story. She was visited throughout the night by doctors and students. The nursing staff was awesome and she was so relieved (pardon the pun) to get the catheter out around 3am. Walking was a tad uncomfortable to say the least. She told me that she was able to leave sometime between 11:30 and 1PM. So naturally I was there at exactly 11:30. If you'll remember I am anything if not punctual. It's a curse. She was just about to get a visit from the pharmacy tech to go over medications she would be taking. We were shown how to take care of her drains and her IV was removed. She was dressed and we were out of there by 12:30. Now the drains reminded me of borg implants from Star Trek. Non biological equipment surgically attached or implanted in ones body. And I was going to have to handle the drains on a daily basis.
Honestly there are just 2 tubes coming out of her left side connected to drainage bulbs that look like transparent grenades which are seated in a special camisole which has pockets on the inside. But this is the first thing I thought of. I like Star Trek. Can you tell? Especially the episode when Picard was assimilated by the borg and became Locutus...sorry off topic. It's hard to describe emptying the drains. After emptying the grenade into the measured container CAREFULLY pinch the tube near the insertion point and with your other hand pinch the tube and slide your fingers down the length of tubing to expel the fluid in the tube all while not tugging on the tube itself otherwise screaming and punching will occur. Once done squeeze the grenade and recap it so that suction will again take place. Replace the grenade into the pocket of the camisole and repeat with the other grenade. 2-3 times daily and record the output. To have the drains removed her daily output should be between 10 and 20 cc's. Here is a helpful graphic for you :)
We got her home after a somewhat bumpy construction laden car ride which she tolerated rather well. Drugs are wonderful things. I got her setup in the recliner and prepped the apartment. TV tray next to her chair with her kindle, phone, water (lots of water) and you know the little cups that you get with NyQuil for measuring dosage? Yeah I used that for medication dispersal. List of meds on the fridge and times taken. I was set and organised. First two nights she slept in the recliner and then tried the bed. Nope, back to the recliner. Then her back started hurting in the mornings. Back to the bed with a different pillow configuration. Better but still back issues. To the recliner which I fear will be here sleeping partner for the time being.
Need one of these...anyone??
The dogs, who LOVE to cuddle up with her in the recliner on a normal day have been a challenge. Xander has been helpful keeping them at bay but sometimes Belle finds a way to jump up there before you can stop her. Here new middle name is DOWN. Molly is too big but has in the past jumped up to try and pretend she is a lapdog. Usually puttle a paw on the arm of the chair as if to ask permission. She hasn't been a problem thus far.
But I'm comfy
Becca has been off her pain meds basically since Saturday. But I have a chart on the fridge, with numbers, all organised and neat. I said this in my head. I knew it wouldn't be long before she resorted to just Tylenol for her pain needs. Always been like that. She's been up and walking probably more than she should be but you can't keep this woman down I tell you. I have stopped asking how she is doing because she hates that. We went to see the plastic surgeon yesterday and the nurse removed the first drain. Yay!! One down and one to go. Probably next week when we see the surgeon. He wasn't there this last time. We are cautiously optimistic that if she doesn't require radiation that she might have her reconstruction sometime in September which would be fine with her.
Oh forgot to mention. Was helping her wash her back the day after she came home and found this little word on her right shoulder. Not sure what this was from but we had a good chuckle over it. I mean it's on her BACK. Still trying to figure out why. You'd think it would say NO as in don't cut on this side.
She desperately wants to be fully healed so she can get back in shape. She's hating how big she's feeling. Knowing her she'll shed like 30 pounds by December. Today she is insisting we go to the movies. Guardians of the Galaxy. She was afraid she wouldn't be able to see it in the theater but she's feeling so good and little to no pain so off we go. Speaking of it's time to get ready. Till next time my little gumdrops.
Monday, August 4, 2014
Honestly It's Not Too Bad
Xander and I went off to have a bite to eat while she was being prepped. She went to radiology to get her nodes mapped and was back in about an hour. She wasn't in the room for 10 minutes and a nurse walks in. "They are ready for you." she says. This was about 10:30. Her surgery was scheduled for 12:25. No time for meaningful goodbyes. In comes the anesthetic team for consent forms to sign. A quick kiss and away she goes. I had this feeling like I've given you our money and you have taken my wife...somewhere. I swear officer I did not hire them to kidnap my wife.
So begins the hours of waiting. I decided to take Xander out to McDonalds for a little normalcy during this time and upon our return I get a call from the hospital. So soon? Did they have to stop for some reason? Is she hemorrhaging? A million other scenarios frashed through my head in a second. The nurse told me that Dr. Kong had removed 4 nodes and that the biopsies were negative. NEGATIVE for cancer!! I was so happy I couldn't think straight. Not good when driving. Composed again I said thank you and hung up. I told Xander the news and he smiled. I was a bit teary eyed but wanted to get back asap. At some point I got turned around and we were heading away from the hospital. Remember couldn't think straight? So I turned around and headed back to...wait.
It was around 2 that Dr. Kong came out and said everything went perfect! The skin and tissue looks great and that the pathology on the tissue would be done with results on Monday and she is very hopeful about those results. She didn't come right out and say it but I could tell she really wanted to say that with a negative result from the breast tissue that radiation would not be necessary. This is extremely good news to me. Becca not to so much because for her, if she didn't get radiation, she would always wonder in the back of her head if she should have. Especially if it comes back. Got some more thinking to do. Can't do this right now.
Now it's a waiting game again with the plastic surgeon. Now I was told that it shouldn't take more than an hour and he had been in there before Kong came out so I'm figuring around 3ish. He came out around 4 and for anyone who knows me knows I am a planner and I keep to schedules. Becca hates it but it's what I do. So that extra hour was pissing me off and making me worry. He finally came out and said it couldn't have gone better! Yes! Of course he followed that up with a big ole "but". Crap! No fair. Can't follow up something like this with a "but". How about I try that with "But... you're beginning to damage my calm!" Apparently there was a slip of the scissors when cutting the adhesive around her other breast and a small inch long or so cut was made. That was it. he felt so bad about it and I was like "That's it???" I'm kinda OK with that. Seriously with all the things that could have gone wrong and you make a boo boo like that? No problemo dude!
Now we wait again being told that we should have a room assignment in about 20 minutes and she would be in recovery for about an hour and brought up to her room. People need to stop giving me times. An hour and a half later I ask about the room and the woman says "oh right, yes, she will be in room 13 (Really? 13th floor too?) 7th floor north tower. Still wondering what was going on with her we head over and after buying a bunch of balloons that I was told I HAD to get (thanks facebook) we got to her room about 2 minutes before she did. She looked ok. Drugged with a droopy left eye but OK! We spent some time catching up with all that had been done. Results and how she's feeling and left around 7 to let her get some rest.
In the exciting conclusion...our trip home and sleeping arrangements, drains (gross) and how we are feeling about the change in her body. More to come. :) Right now we are just so very happy!!
Friday, July 25, 2014
The Road Ahead
Yesterday we traveled once more to Froederdt and met with a couple nurses to explain EVERYTHING that will happen next Wednesday and beyond. Had voices coming at us seemingly from every direction explaining the timeline, restrictions after, what to do before and something about flying but it's not important and that's why they don't explain the problems with flying anymore. (?) All I know right now is that she has 3 days before she has to be a good girl. So anything she wants to do or have before Tuesday night I'm making it happen.
Wednesday morning at 5 am we will be getting up and ready. Her bag will already be packed with her essentials (Kindle, charger, phone etc ;)) along with the fashionable camisole they provided for comfort and to hold the drains. We have to be there at 7 so Becca can get the sentinel nodes identified through mapping using a radioactive dye and the surgery is at 12:25. Should take about 3-4 hours. During the surgery the surgical oncologist will locate the sentinel nodes and remove 2-3. These will be sent to pathology while the mastectomy is done. Once the lab results come back hopefully negative that will be that and the plastic surgeon will step in and place the tissue expander. If the results come back positive the axillary nodes will be removed. This would increase her chances of getting lymphedema.
Plenty of restrictions after her hospital stay of 1-2 nights. Pain management is a big part of her coming home. She's the kind of person who won't speak up about pain so I've been reinforcing the fact that she will need to VERY honest about her pain. No playing the tough chic. The drains (2-3 of them) will be in for a few weeks and I get to drain and record the volume 4 times a day. FUN! It's actually quite easy so no worries. The reconstruction won't be till some time after radiation after she is fully healed from it's effects. This could be a year or more. Until then she will have the expander in place to hold the shape of the breast. A couple weeks after surgery we'll go back and the plastic surgeon will inject saline into it to get the right size. We'll go and do this a few times because they can't inflate it all at once.
Oh yeah she can't drive for the first few weeks and has lifting and arm restrictions. I am the cook for awhile so I hope they can get used to take out lol. In other family news I am happy to report that Xander has received about 65 or so cards for the card shower! He still has no idea what is going on and we have only given him about 15 over the course of the last week. We're saving the bulk for his birthday. Everyone who has sent one has been so wonderful and have written so many nice comments about him and the type of man he's becoming. Thank you to everyone who has sent one and if you know someone who hasn't please question them about it lol. It's not too late to be apart of this!
I'll be providing updates on FB the day of surgery but probably won't be making another blog post for about a week after. Let you all in on how things are going with Becca and her road to recovery. Keep thinking NEGATIVE thoughts (you know what I mean) and keep her in your thoughts. Thanks again for reading and keeping up with us. Much love to all of you! Until next time my little gumdrops...
Wednesday morning at 5 am we will be getting up and ready. Her bag will already be packed with her essentials (Kindle, charger, phone etc ;)) along with the fashionable camisole they provided for comfort and to hold the drains. We have to be there at 7 so Becca can get the sentinel nodes identified through mapping using a radioactive dye and the surgery is at 12:25. Should take about 3-4 hours. During the surgery the surgical oncologist will locate the sentinel nodes and remove 2-3. These will be sent to pathology while the mastectomy is done. Once the lab results come back hopefully negative that will be that and the plastic surgeon will step in and place the tissue expander. If the results come back positive the axillary nodes will be removed. This would increase her chances of getting lymphedema.
Plenty of restrictions after her hospital stay of 1-2 nights. Pain management is a big part of her coming home. She's the kind of person who won't speak up about pain so I've been reinforcing the fact that she will need to VERY honest about her pain. No playing the tough chic. The drains (2-3 of them) will be in for a few weeks and I get to drain and record the volume 4 times a day. FUN! It's actually quite easy so no worries. The reconstruction won't be till some time after radiation after she is fully healed from it's effects. This could be a year or more. Until then she will have the expander in place to hold the shape of the breast. A couple weeks after surgery we'll go back and the plastic surgeon will inject saline into it to get the right size. We'll go and do this a few times because they can't inflate it all at once.
Oh yeah she can't drive for the first few weeks and has lifting and arm restrictions. I am the cook for awhile so I hope they can get used to take out lol. In other family news I am happy to report that Xander has received about 65 or so cards for the card shower! He still has no idea what is going on and we have only given him about 15 over the course of the last week. We're saving the bulk for his birthday. Everyone who has sent one has been so wonderful and have written so many nice comments about him and the type of man he's becoming. Thank you to everyone who has sent one and if you know someone who hasn't please question them about it lol. It's not too late to be apart of this!
I'll be providing updates on FB the day of surgery but probably won't be making another blog post for about a week after. Let you all in on how things are going with Becca and her road to recovery. Keep thinking NEGATIVE thoughts (you know what I mean) and keep her in your thoughts. Thanks again for reading and keeping up with us. Much love to all of you! Until next time my little gumdrops...
Thursday, July 17, 2014
13 Days Till The Great Boob-Off!
I shouldn't say boob-off as she will still have it. I guess they take like a larger version of a classic ice cream scoop and just scoop out all the tissue. The expander will go in and she will have to go back every week or so and have it filled more until it's the size she wants (no not bigger unfortunately ;) ). She will be in the hospital 1-2 nights depending on how she feels. I told her take the extra day if she wants to but of course she's thinking about Xander and doesn't want to come home ON his birthday. Isn't she a peach? Much like her head I guess but the hair is a bit longer and darker now.
Radiation will take place probably the end of August or first week in September. After that, well, not too sure but what we do now know thanks to her wonderful plastic surgeon is that the actual reconstruction will be a year to a year and a half from now. This news SUCKED!! I felt so bad for her. All we knew before this was her oncologist saying she should be all done by thanksgiving. We assumed all done ment ALL DONE. Talk about a bummer. She'll get used to the idea in time, just like her head and the hair loss.
Now it's a sit and wait kinda thing. We are going to try and do some stuff the next couple weekends to make up for her losing the rest of the summer. Chicago this weekend and next weekend we're still deciding on. We are throwing Xander a card shower for his birthday since she won't be up to celebrate. 18 cards so far! We are excited to be doing this for him. He's been amazing throughout this whole year. If you haven't heard about this and would like to send him a birthday card the address is 1706 Birchwood st. #6 Delavan WI 53115.
Sorry for not getting a post in for awhile. I'm sure with all the new things happening with the surgery and her being home for a month I will have more material to work with. Thinking I might get her a bell to ring when she needs something. That experience could be a post on it's own! Be well and stay safe! Until next time America. (Points to whomever can name who coined that phrase)
Radiation will take place probably the end of August or first week in September. After that, well, not too sure but what we do now know thanks to her wonderful plastic surgeon is that the actual reconstruction will be a year to a year and a half from now. This news SUCKED!! I felt so bad for her. All we knew before this was her oncologist saying she should be all done by thanksgiving. We assumed all done ment ALL DONE. Talk about a bummer. She'll get used to the idea in time, just like her head and the hair loss.
Now it's a sit and wait kinda thing. We are going to try and do some stuff the next couple weekends to make up for her losing the rest of the summer. Chicago this weekend and next weekend we're still deciding on. We are throwing Xander a card shower for his birthday since she won't be up to celebrate. 18 cards so far! We are excited to be doing this for him. He's been amazing throughout this whole year. If you haven't heard about this and would like to send him a birthday card the address is 1706 Birchwood st. #6 Delavan WI 53115.
Sorry for not getting a post in for awhile. I'm sure with all the new things happening with the surgery and her being home for a month I will have more material to work with. Thinking I might get her a bell to ring when she needs something. That experience could be a post on it's own! Be well and stay safe! Until next time America. (Points to whomever can name who coined that phrase)
Wednesday, June 25, 2014
End of Chaper One
Thursday this week is the LAST chemo treatment!! This part of her journey is over and she has come through with flying colors. We met with her surgical oncologist yesterday and after the examination she said she couldn't feel anything. NOTHING! She's not even going to bother with any scans. I heard this and immediately I'm thinking um, yes scans, scan her now please. I know the doctor knows what she's doing but I want conformation.
Anyways on to the fun part. Proceed with operation Information Overload. Let's start with radiation. I should preface this with saying I am going to tell you all I remember and understand. There are aspects that I don't quite get but I'll do my best. Radiation is standard practice and we knew that going in. However we were told that it is a likelihood and there is a possibility that she would not have to have it. This I clung onto like a scared kid and his favorite stuffed animal. Now IF she has radiation depends on clinical trials that she is eligible for. Normally, because she had two lymph nodes test positive, the whole lymph node structure in her armpit would be removed. Now this has a 30% chance of leaving her with Lymphedema. That's like 1 in 3.
Now the clinical trials are trying to prove that you don't have to take the whole thing and can just take out those nodes that positive. If she chooses the trial she has a 75% chance of not...hold on. Still trying to figure this out. Here...this is what Becca says about it. "Now, with this clinical trial, I might not have to have that risk. See, they'd test the nodes during surgery and whether they turned out positive for cancer or not would throw me into a whole randomized flow chart of possible treatments, 75% of which do not include this part of the surgery. One of which doesn't even include radiation." FUN!
Oh I forgot to mention that because it's a clinical trial everything has to be done in controlled environment including all equipment. Which means it would have to be done at authorized facilities. All of which are at least 40 minutes away. Now for the best part. If radiation is necessary it would have to be done, as part of the trial, most likely at Froederdt, EVERY WEEKDAY FOR FIVE WEEKS. That's about 750.00 in gas and about 2500 miles put on the car. If she chooses not to be in the trial she still has to go to Froederdt however AND she's back to the 1 out of 3. We thought this part after chemo would be easy. HA!
We will be talking it over this week and let the oncologist know next week. Lots to process. With that being said Becca's hair is coming back fast! It's good to see. All the docs have been saying she is the poster child for cancer treatment. I'll add a photo if she'll let me. Thanks for reading and keeping up with our journey. All the thoughts and well wishes, all the words of encouragement and financial support has been fantastic. Remember to tell everyone you know about the fundraiser. We could not get through this without each and every one of you.
Thursday, June 12, 2014
I Married An Idiot pt.2
Yup it's worse. Chemo does some really weird things to the brain. She's so frustrated not being able to come up with words like she used to. Does make for some interesting conversations. Most of the time sit back and let her stumble around in her head thinking of the word she wants to say cause...funny. She used to be very intelligent and she still is deep down. Just being suppressed I imagine. She'll be back. Today she's getting her 10th treatment which means only 2 left after today. End is in sight! We have an appointment with the doc over at Froederdt on the 24th to go over where we go from here and whether or not radiation is needed.
Her hair is coming back as well as her eye lashes. It's a nice reminder that this part is almost over. Hot flashes are a pain and she's not sleeping as well as she should be because of them. Afraid it might be like that for the foreseeable future because of the early onset menopause that she's been sent into. Blood pressure is another issue. She's always run low with that but chemo sends it even lower. To combat that she's drinking a ton of water a day. When she doesn't get enough she acts like she's in slow motion or drugged. Now that with her mental faculties impaired is like trying to converse with a 5 year old who just woke up.
She's the one who has to go through all this. Xander and I have ring side seats. She's doing this to stay with us and wants us to do the same just in another way. How do you say no to that? Therefore we have begun eating better. No refined sugars. No white flour. Lots of fresh stuff. you know...no fun :) It hasn't been all bad. She's been finding some really good recipes. And we now have a couple planter boxes with 4 different herbs growing. Whatever we have to do to stay together I'm good with it. But whole wheat toast with my eggs?? Nope.
We now know how much we owe for the year and won't be charged anymore. The fundraiser has stalled and I'm not sure how to proceed. We want to pay the bills in full and the hospitals have been good for now excepting what we can give. All in all we are still about 12,000 short which causes me to stress at times. I just keep reminding myself that you do what we can and if they get pushy they won't get a dime. Been bankrupt before we can get though it again if we have to. I imagine what would have happened if we didn't have insurance. We had thought about taking a year off because the premiums were so high this time. Glad we didn't.
As always much love to you all. Share the fundraiser. Still looking for that one person out there that has the resources to put an end to it all. I can tell you this. If we are ever in a position to help someone else, believe me, we will be doing just that.
Her hair is coming back as well as her eye lashes. It's a nice reminder that this part is almost over. Hot flashes are a pain and she's not sleeping as well as she should be because of them. Afraid it might be like that for the foreseeable future because of the early onset menopause that she's been sent into. Blood pressure is another issue. She's always run low with that but chemo sends it even lower. To combat that she's drinking a ton of water a day. When she doesn't get enough she acts like she's in slow motion or drugged. Now that with her mental faculties impaired is like trying to converse with a 5 year old who just woke up.
She's the one who has to go through all this. Xander and I have ring side seats. She's doing this to stay with us and wants us to do the same just in another way. How do you say no to that? Therefore we have begun eating better. No refined sugars. No white flour. Lots of fresh stuff. you know...no fun :) It hasn't been all bad. She's been finding some really good recipes. And we now have a couple planter boxes with 4 different herbs growing. Whatever we have to do to stay together I'm good with it. But whole wheat toast with my eggs?? Nope.
We now know how much we owe for the year and won't be charged anymore. The fundraiser has stalled and I'm not sure how to proceed. We want to pay the bills in full and the hospitals have been good for now excepting what we can give. All in all we are still about 12,000 short which causes me to stress at times. I just keep reminding myself that you do what we can and if they get pushy they won't get a dime. Been bankrupt before we can get though it again if we have to. I imagine what would have happened if we didn't have insurance. We had thought about taking a year off because the premiums were so high this time. Glad we didn't.
As always much love to you all. Share the fundraiser. Still looking for that one person out there that has the resources to put an end to it all. I can tell you this. If we are ever in a position to help someone else, believe me, we will be doing just that.
Thursday, May 29, 2014
Super small post
So since February when she started chemo Becca has been the model patient. Excelling in all her numbers and counts. Little to no side effects although those have been on the rise as of late. But all in all she's been doing very well. And this week has been no exception except for two changes to report. She now has a full head of peach fuzz with some stubble in the back by her neck. Nursing staff today were happy about that. Her white cell count was low again. Not low enough to stop treatments....yet. Doc isn't too worried but will be keeping a close eye on those numbers. 4 more weeks to go! Like I said. Small post but will update if anything changes. Remember to keep posting the fundraiser link and hopefully we can annoy new people into donating :) Lots of love to all of you and have a GREAT weekend!
Tuesday, May 13, 2014
Little But Some News
Its's been awhile since my last post but to be honest nothing has really changed for Becca. The muscle pain is getting a little worse but aleve is taking care of that most of the time. She still has fatigue but no more than during the last round. Hot flashes abound which wakes her at times when she should be sleeping and her eye lashes are starting to go. Right now we are mainly concerned about her heart rate. Before chemo she was always low. Around 80 BPM resting. That's now around 100. Exercise is tricky which is pissing her off something fierce. We are 7 weeks away from the end of chemo which is now shorter in duration each time we go. about 2.5 hours rather than 4. We are loving that!
To continue with some good news some of you know my family runs a booth at the Walworth County Fair. The Brat Pit! We've had that spot and stand for as long as I can remember. This year and hopefully years to come it was decided that we will start a non-profit booth. Nothing changes except all profits, usually less than 3K, after expenses, will go...somewhere. I say this because we don't know exactly how we want to do. This year will be for Becca and the medical bills and I'm hopeful that with this in mind the total after expenses will be higher. It's quite possible subsequent years may go to other cancer victims and families. Nothing is decided after this year...yet.
With that said I will be looking for volunteers to man the booth. I'll be putting up a sign up post later this year but keep it in mind. All the people in the past have always been volunteers however we are hoping that with the money going to causes and individuals more people will want to get involved to help those who need it. As always thank you all for the support and words of encouragement. It means the world to us to know you are out there. And here's my love. Pass the word and share like crazy. I know you will because you are AWESOME!
To continue with some good news some of you know my family runs a booth at the Walworth County Fair. The Brat Pit! We've had that spot and stand for as long as I can remember. This year and hopefully years to come it was decided that we will start a non-profit booth. Nothing changes except all profits, usually less than 3K, after expenses, will go...somewhere. I say this because we don't know exactly how we want to do. This year will be for Becca and the medical bills and I'm hopeful that with this in mind the total after expenses will be higher. It's quite possible subsequent years may go to other cancer victims and families. Nothing is decided after this year...yet.
With that said I will be looking for volunteers to man the booth. I'll be putting up a sign up post later this year but keep it in mind. All the people in the past have always been volunteers however we are hoping that with the money going to causes and individuals more people will want to get involved to help those who need it. As always thank you all for the support and words of encouragement. It means the world to us to know you are out there. And here's my love. Pass the word and share like crazy. I know you will because you are AWESOME!
Sunday, April 27, 2014
Journey To The Land Of Food
We are back from our epic journey to the land of the north known to us wisconsinites simply as "The Dells". We try to go every year (for the last 13 years) around the time we get our tax returns but this year was different. We didn't know how becca was going to do with chemo. We postponed and waited and by the time it looked like she would be fine the money wasn't there anymore. We're halfway through chemo and just decided we need a breather so I got some extra shifts, a couple small gifts from friends and we were able to pull together a 2 night stay at the Wilderness Resort. This is our favorite resort and we are very loyal. So loyal in fact that we got a 20.00 discount on the Friday night and a free room upgrade from a standard to one with a separate master bedroom and full kitchen! I say this because I like to believe it wasn't because of the beautiful bald woman standing next to me.
We get to the room and the first thing we do is order in Sarento's pizza. SO GOOD! After we decide to skip any water based activities and head down to the mini golf. Becca won which is odd because I always do but I've been having back issues and my knee isn't 100% and yada yada yada...We played in the arcade for a time but by then it was about 9:30 so we decided to head to bed and get a jump on tomorrow.
Breakfast buffet first then off to one of the 3 indoor waterparks. Xander quickly noticed it's a lot like a kiddie park and aside from the slides and lazy river it wasn't to his liking. Off to the wave pool area with sun and lounge chairs. We normally get a cabana for a whole day staying in just this park so I looked into it remembering it's usually 75.00 off season. There was 1 left. SWEET! 175.00...NOT SO SWEET! So the cabana is out. Meanwhile Xander is hungry already so chicken fingers it is. After swimming in the wave pool he's tired (poor thing) so we all go down the raft slide. That was fun-ish. More for him. Then we went and got flushed on that raft ride that from the outside looks like a sideways toilet bowl. That was FUN! Xander went backwards (he hates me) and look on his face was priceless!
Becca and I got our traditional 2-4-1 margaritas and I scored a few lounge chairs and all was right with the world. This is about the time Xander wanted to complain as all teenage boys do. He ended up going back to the room for some time by himself which was fine. Problem being when we got back he still wanted to be alone so Becca and I showered and went back down to the arcade knowing full well we were spending money to make E-tickets for the loner to use to buy some crap. I swear that setup is the greatest con ever.
We return and then it's off to dinner at the Wisconsin Brew Pub. The burgers were great, fried pickles and potato wedges wrapped in bacon we awesome, and I had a twice baked bacon potato that I kid you not I could have as a meal. Damn was that tasty! After having our meal we headed back for some laser tag and again an early night in. Xander of course pulled the curtain separating the living room and immersed himself in youtube videos. meanwhile I'm thinking of breakfast at Paul Bunyans in the morning after we check out.
Family style breakfast and lots of it. Good and plentiful. After filling up we headed to downtown dells and caught Ripley's Believe it or Not because you have to at least once. Not worth the money in my opinion but the boy enjoyed it and Becca smiled a lot while taking a ton of pictures. That was pretty much it. We were all tired and just wanted to get home. Xander a bit more. So we waved good-bye till next year.
Where is all the cancer talk you ask? Where's the update? This is it. We didn't talk of chemo or treatments, bald heads or muscle aches, hot flashes or bills. We were just a family on vacation for a couple days and I tell you it was wonderful. Oh sure we'd get the looks sometimes and a not so subtle whispering. These were quickly ignored. Point is she is not her cancer and sometimes a break to remind yourselves of that is just what the doctor ordered.
We get to the room and the first thing we do is order in Sarento's pizza. SO GOOD! After we decide to skip any water based activities and head down to the mini golf. Becca won which is odd because I always do but I've been having back issues and my knee isn't 100% and yada yada yada...We played in the arcade for a time but by then it was about 9:30 so we decided to head to bed and get a jump on tomorrow.
Breakfast buffet first then off to one of the 3 indoor waterparks. Xander quickly noticed it's a lot like a kiddie park and aside from the slides and lazy river it wasn't to his liking. Off to the wave pool area with sun and lounge chairs. We normally get a cabana for a whole day staying in just this park so I looked into it remembering it's usually 75.00 off season. There was 1 left. SWEET! 175.00...NOT SO SWEET! So the cabana is out. Meanwhile Xander is hungry already so chicken fingers it is. After swimming in the wave pool he's tired (poor thing) so we all go down the raft slide. That was fun-ish. More for him. Then we went and got flushed on that raft ride that from the outside looks like a sideways toilet bowl. That was FUN! Xander went backwards (he hates me) and look on his face was priceless!
Becca and I got our traditional 2-4-1 margaritas and I scored a few lounge chairs and all was right with the world. This is about the time Xander wanted to complain as all teenage boys do. He ended up going back to the room for some time by himself which was fine. Problem being when we got back he still wanted to be alone so Becca and I showered and went back down to the arcade knowing full well we were spending money to make E-tickets for the loner to use to buy some crap. I swear that setup is the greatest con ever.
We return and then it's off to dinner at the Wisconsin Brew Pub. The burgers were great, fried pickles and potato wedges wrapped in bacon we awesome, and I had a twice baked bacon potato that I kid you not I could have as a meal. Damn was that tasty! After having our meal we headed back for some laser tag and again an early night in. Xander of course pulled the curtain separating the living room and immersed himself in youtube videos. meanwhile I'm thinking of breakfast at Paul Bunyans in the morning after we check out.
Family style breakfast and lots of it. Good and plentiful. After filling up we headed to downtown dells and caught Ripley's Believe it or Not because you have to at least once. Not worth the money in my opinion but the boy enjoyed it and Becca smiled a lot while taking a ton of pictures. That was pretty much it. We were all tired and just wanted to get home. Xander a bit more. So we waved good-bye till next year.
Where is all the cancer talk you ask? Where's the update? This is it. We didn't talk of chemo or treatments, bald heads or muscle aches, hot flashes or bills. We were just a family on vacation for a couple days and I tell you it was wonderful. Oh sure we'd get the looks sometimes and a not so subtle whispering. These were quickly ignored. Point is she is not her cancer and sometimes a break to remind yourselves of that is just what the doctor ordered.
Saturday, April 12, 2014
I married an idiot
Becca started her 2nd round of chemo on Thursday. Now it's every week for twelve weeks and this first one was no problem. She is having some twinges in large muscle groups but nothing serious and there has been no neuropathy in her extremities which is possible but usually not till around 6 weeks in. All in all chemo has been pretty easy on her aside from the hair loss. She misses her locks. She's hating the scarves at work and can't wear the wig comfortably. Most of the time she goes without when out in public now and always at home. It might be weird later on when she does have hair lol.
Now onto my dear wife being an idiot. She is at times scatter brained but those times are few and far between. This is not the case anymore. She has issues finding words which is fun because that's usually me and now the tables have been turned ha ha ha. To get a good understanding on what "Chemo Brain" is like I will use her own words.
From Becca:
Well, chemo brain has kicked in. It isn't constant, but at the end of the last 2 cycles, I've been hit with it for a couple of days. (Therefore, if my sentence structure doesn't always make sense here, please don't hold it against me.)
Let me give you a snapshot of how my brain is (not) functioning.
Get to work.
Turn on computer, music, digital photo frame
Open email
Stare blankly at email for 2 minutes
Realize I'm staring blankly at email and begin running Monday morning reports
Pause music to go to printer and get reports
Bring reports back to office
*
*
*
*
The internet is boring.
*
*
*
Ooh - I should read up on Captain America now that I've seen it.
Commence reading
*
*
Remember I'm at work, it's Monday, and I have reports to do.
Commence working on reports
Realize halfway through that I'm entering the wrong numbers
S@!t
*
*
*
*
Okay, what was I doing?
Redo reports using correct numbers, brain functioning at 100%, all is well.
Finish reports, double-checking information, speedy and efficient as always.
Compose email to boss:
The reports weekly are attached.
no...delete
The resports weekly are attached.
Crap! No! delete...
Your weekly reports...
*
*
*
s&*t!
...are attached.
Send email without attachment.
*
*
*
Remember I was listening to music before and start it up again.
Start doing other work. spot on, brain working at full capacity.
Receive email from boss looking for attachment.
Oh, for f@%k's sake!
Hit reply
*
*
*
Attach reports and send.
Now onto my dear wife being an idiot. She is at times scatter brained but those times are few and far between. This is not the case anymore. She has issues finding words which is fun because that's usually me and now the tables have been turned ha ha ha. To get a good understanding on what "Chemo Brain" is like I will use her own words.
From Becca:
Well, chemo brain has kicked in. It isn't constant, but at the end of the last 2 cycles, I've been hit with it for a couple of days. (Therefore, if my sentence structure doesn't always make sense here, please don't hold it against me.)
Let me give you a snapshot of how my brain is (not) functioning.
Get to work.
Turn on computer, music, digital photo frame
Open email
Stare blankly at email for 2 minutes
Realize I'm staring blankly at email and begin running Monday morning reports
Pause music to go to printer and get reports
Bring reports back to office
*
*
*
The internet is boring.
*
*
*
Ooh - I should read up on Captain America now that I've seen it.
Commence reading
*
*
Remember I'm at work, it's Monday, and I have reports to do.
Commence working on reports
Realize halfway through that I'm entering the wrong numbers
S@!t
*
*
*
*
Okay, what was I doing?
Redo reports using correct numbers, brain functioning at 100%, all is well.
Finish reports, double-checking information, speedy and efficient as always.
Compose email to boss:
The reports weekly are attached.
no...delete
The resports weekly are attached.
Crap! No! delete...
Your weekly reports...
*
*
*
s&*t!
...are attached.
Send email without attachment.
*
*
*
Remember I was listening to music before and start it up again.
Start doing other work. spot on, brain working at full capacity.
Receive email from boss looking for attachment.
Oh, for f@%k's sake!
Hit reply
*
*
*
Attach reports and send.
So that's what she has been dealing with and when I say that I mean me as well. I swear she's worse at home and there have been time when I've thought that she is now brain damaged. Thanks Cancer! You Rock!! This post is somewhat of a cop out because I'm lazy and decided to use hers. In my defense though it's better coming from her than me. In all honesty I was amazed she could type it out given her faculties the way they are So I'm actually showing her off lol. Have a great week everyone!!
Friday, March 28, 2014
She's rounding 1st...
With baseball season approaching I thought the title was witty lol. Yesterday Becca received her final treatment with the "red devil"! This part of her treatment is done and some other good news. The masses have begun to shrink! Oh happy day some improvement! No scans or imaging just by touch but you can tell and more importantly she can tell. It really is a wonderful thing and gives renewed hope. Until now all that she has been going thru seemed to be for nothing but a promise that treatment would DO something. Now we can say it is and have renewed drive to get through the next phase.
In 2 weeks she starts her weekly treatments. Lower risk of side effects and it will be nice to go every week. Will feel that we are rolling along and not sitting idle while we wait. looking at the end of June and can kind of make it out now. She's on her way to 2nd soon to be rounding it and on her way to 3rd. Keep up the words of support and little messages to her. Share the fundraiser link and keep word out there. You are all the most wonderful people we have ever known. This little improvement has happened in part because of you :)
Saturday, March 22, 2014
So that happened
Last week I let you know that Becca wasn't doing too well. That was fun! She was in bed for 3 days, migraines galore, and no energy what-so-ever. She is doing better now I am happy to report. The combination of chemo kicking her immune system down a few hundred notches and a nasty head cold is what did it. You know she still handled it better than I would have.
She was feeling a little better Sunday and was out of bed most of the day. Even ventured to the outside world a couple times. I was, however, able to convince her to stay home Monday and Tuesday as she just looked wiped. She's still so tired. Nothing like this last weekend but it's enough. Almost came home on Thursday, sad and angry, because of it. Looking down the road of this thing she can't yet see the light and that's not helping. We've been trying to think about a trip to take next year during spring break. Something to work towards and look forward to. Suggestions welcome. This weekend she'll venture out to Janesville and look for picture frames to finish a project. She's looking forward to that! It's outside!
On top of it all Xander was sick too mid week. Today she hugged him for the first time since a week ago Friday. I've been keeping busy trying to keep the place clean. Bought a small air purifier for her office at work which will help (I hope) keep the crap out of her. Really wish she didn't have to work in a basement of an old building and around so many people with their germs. Need to get a whole house purifier but don't have the funds right now. Working on it.
Trying to find ways of making extra cash. Karaoke isn't going anywhere and even if it did I got one speaker that's bad off and can't see spending money on repairing/replacing it without knowing I'll make money with it. May have to bust out the fishnets and find a corner soon. Yeah that'll work.
Maybe this would work better for her ;)
Sunday, March 16, 2014
Is it a cold or is it chemo?
Becca has been down all weekend with what we think is a head cold. Bad headaches, lethargy, no nausea but she's not eating a lot. Could be the chemo as the first weekend after treatment isn't the best but if it is chemo this has been the worst so far. Knowing her she will still try to go to work tomorrow. Trying to get her to stay home because after staying in bed for so long she's not going to have the energy. She's stubborn though so my chances of success are slim to none. Made her some eggs and toast and I check in every hour or so to see if she needs anything.
Short post I know but not much to say. One more treatment on the 27th and then two weeks after that she starts her 12 week run getting treatment once a week. Can't be done soon enough. She so wants to get back to her old self. Bills are coming in and everybody has been wonderful with payment plans. I do have to say without our supporters donating to our fundraiser I don't know what we would do. Bankruptcy after all is said and done comes to mind. Thank you all for your help and positive vibes. Please continue to spread the word. Facebook, Twitter, anything and everything. I'll keep you posted and get another post out next week sometime.
Short post I know but not much to say. One more treatment on the 27th and then two weeks after that she starts her 12 week run getting treatment once a week. Can't be done soon enough. She so wants to get back to her old self. Bills are coming in and everybody has been wonderful with payment plans. I do have to say without our supporters donating to our fundraiser I don't know what we would do. Bankruptcy after all is said and done comes to mind. Thank you all for your help and positive vibes. Please continue to spread the word. Facebook, Twitter, anything and everything. I'll keep you posted and get another post out next week sometime.
Friday, March 7, 2014
Are We There Yet?
So sorry it's been a bit but not a lot has changed. Becca is doing well and her treatments are now every 2 weeks. She is feeling tired and keeps complaining about stuff which is starting to get on my nerves. I mean suck it up already. I have problems too but you don't see me bitching about them.
The stubble on her head continues to shed (hey that rhymes) and is a constant pain for her. We thought of shaving it off but I'm afraid she'd bleed out before I could finish so, as death is not the goal here, we'll just wait it out. I find myself back into the routine of asking her how she's doing a lot. I know she's fine and would tell me if she wasn't but I can't help it. It weighs on her the amount of time between now and when she can say it's over. When you think about it it's a bit daunting to imagine. You will have 8-12 months of your life that will no longer be your own and will be bound by medical procedures and rules and guidelines during that period to which you must adhere. On top of that she hates being the center of attention. Which is fine because that's my job dammit
.
She took today off to rest and try to get some sleep. I doubt that will happen as her body is as stubborn as she is. I took morning and went shopping, ran some errands and gave blood, hoping she would sleep but NOOOOO. Got a few hours to kill before I make dinner so while she's laying down in the bedroom (not sleeping probably) I'll watch some recorded "crap" shows (as she likes to call them) and wait till she comes out so I can again ask "how are you doing?".
Anyways the color red in any beverage makes her want to puke. It's the color of the chemo she gets right now so those beverages are now outlawed till further notice. Her throat has been sore. We think due to the shot she gets the day after chemo to boost her immune system. This has affected her diet but she is still getting food in so that's good. Sleeplessness has been a big problem but she assures me she will try to take her pills before bed from now on. She's just not a pill person unless it's REALLY necessary.
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Thursday, February 27, 2014
Overachiever :)
So this will be short and sweet because Becca is doing so well with chemo there. is. no. news. bills are starting to come in now and because she went and got biopsies in December that bill went on the old insurance so that means another huge maximum out of pocket. Yay!!!! Dealing with that as we can and so far the hospitals have been good at payment plans. As long as she continues to get treatment. speaking of treatments she now goes every 2 weeks instead of 3 with a shot after each to boost her immune system. Her stubbly hair continues to relieve themselves from her scalp and soon she shall be smooth as a baby's bottom. Got a couple pics for ya'll. Thanks again for all the support. I really wish I had more to tell ya. Keep sharing and getting word out. We love ya!!
Saturday, February 22, 2014
Hair Today Gone Tomor..er...Today!
I know it's been awhile but nothing has really happened that warrants reporting. Plus I had been sick for the last week which put Becca on the futon because of her immune system. Before you start bitching me out she MADE me take the bed and there is no arguing with her on stuff like that. Secretly I think she likes the futon and played the martyr for favors to be named later.
Becca has been sailing through this first chemo treatment. So much so she is upping her schedule to every 2 weeks instead of every 3. She just wants this to get done and move on. She has been amazing! There have been some side effects like swollen gums and problems with taste. Her hair is starting to come out more now which brings me to the reason for today's post.
Becca has been sailing through this first chemo treatment. So much so she is upping her schedule to every 2 weeks instead of every 3. She just wants this to get done and move on. She has been amazing! There have been some side effects like swollen gums and problems with taste. Her hair is starting to come out more now which brings me to the reason for today's post.
That's right folks. OFF WITH HER HAIR!!
It's been on her mind a lot lately. HA! On her mind?? Yeah ok...reaching. Anyways the deed needs to be done. So we went into the bathroom, sat her down in a chair, and I grabbed the clippers. Needless to say she handled this as she has this whole thing. Wonderfully! Now she kinda reminds me of Natalie Portman in "V for Vendetta". I would post a pic but she's just not ready yet. In the next post I hope to get a few shots of her with her wig and other head gear. For now I will leave you with this cause like I said...reminds me of Portman.
Of course she wasn't crying :)
Just as bad ass!!
So today, the day after I made this post, she decides to take a picture of herself and say "Here! If you want a pic to put on the blog use this one." So now I have to let you all know about the post edit. She's a wonderful pain in my ass isn't she? Here she is. Velcro!!! (she's complaining that her head sticks to everything lol)
Beautiful :)
Wednesday, February 12, 2014
Wonder Woman
Becca is doing ok. About a week in and the main thing is fatigue. Feeling ill at times but fades very fast. Today she got her first metallic taste when she was drinking water. Speaking of water she's up to and needs about 3 liters a day. She's been getting dizzy and dehydration can cause that so the water intake is helping with that.
Appetite has been good and hasn't been nauseous at all hardly. She is really sailing through this and we just hope it stays that way. Tomorrow she picks up her hair from Attitudes here in Delavan. When she lets me I'll try to get a pic on here. She's gonna have bangs!! LOL! Hasn't had bangs since she was little.
I have been pretty much been going out of my mind. I can prep and worry and ask but honestly I have nothing to do through this most of the time. Waiting to be called off the bench in a way. I busy myself cleaning and stumbling through the interwebs to pass the time. She will come home and I'll ask if she's ok to which she will say yes. I know she reads this but I said this is where we put it all out there and this is part of it.
I went to walmart today to get a "few" things and ended up getting more cleaning supplies. I was going to do it all today but I listened to her and decided to split it up the rest of the week. I'm not sleeping well but that's not all about her and it's making me a bit pissy and down at times. I need something to do but I don't know what. I feel like I'm whining writing this out.
I wish I had a hobby to delve into. Told Becca I was going to start jigsaw puzzles and hang them all over the place. I don't know. No matter what I'm here for her and the trials I have to go through pale in comparison to hers. I've always been one to try and fix things and help people but in this case I can't fix and can only help when needed. Think tomorrow I will clean the fridge.
I went to walmart today to get a "few" things and ended up getting more cleaning supplies. I was going to do it all today but I listened to her and decided to split it up the rest of the week. I'm not sleeping well but that's not all about her and it's making me a bit pissy and down at times. I need something to do but I don't know what. I feel like I'm whining writing this out.
I wish I had a hobby to delve into. Told Becca I was going to start jigsaw puzzles and hang them all over the place. I don't know. No matter what I'm here for her and the trials I have to go through pale in comparison to hers. I've always been one to try and fix things and help people but in this case I can't fix and can only help when needed. Think tomorrow I will clean the fridge.
Saturday, February 8, 2014
Waiting For The Suck
Where is it? Where is the total suckage? We were told that ALL cancer carcinoma patients are wracked with pain and sickness when going through chemo. We were told this by television and other media, horror stories galore. Of course we know better now by getting our information from oncologists and nurses. People who KNOW what to expect. Not to mention other patients and family members, friends of those patients. Which reminds me, we know a lot of people who know A LOT of people with cancer, damnit, carcinoma (I swear she will be punished for this). Everyone and their mother offering their own view and sometimes irrational fear of this disease. It's enough to make your head spin. What was I saying? Oh yeah...
The suck! Becca has been fine the first couple days. She came home from work Friday more tired than usual so I'm thinking "here we go" and then...that's it. Nothing more just tired. She ended up going to bed around 8pm. I think partly because I kept asking how she was. I'm trying not to do that honest I am ;-).
Today is just a little worse as she woke up a little nauseous. As she puts it feeling pregnant during the first couple months. Lots of rest and water. Oh yes water! Tons of the clear cool liquid which she has found she has to sip because chugging is no bueno. Dehydration is a problem but she's managing nicely. I say this mainly because of her wonderful co-workers who raided a pantry I think and has thus far given her 4 HUGE TJ Maxx bags, you know the ones that you could fit a small fridge inside, yeah those, filled with jello, gatorade, broths, pudding, water, jello, crackers, candy, jello, books, magazines.... did I mention jello? I had to go out today and get a cheap 4 shelf stand alone for all the overflow of pantry items we don't have room for. I poke fun but it really is so very kind of them.
The benefit page is going well with almost 2500 in donations which is just astonishing. I lowered the goal and feel really good about getting to that point. It really helps and takes some of the worry out of the noggin so I can worry more about her. She's reading this so that is why I say it lol. So please keep sharing. Especially with people in a higher tax bracket. Still waiting on that anonymous donation from a millionaire who just wants to help people. Ever see Indecent Proposal? Yeah nothing like that. However I would think about selling myself if need be.
So there you are my little gumdrops. That's the skinny, the 411, the downlow on Becca. Till next time and remember to dance like no one is watching you (but they really are...and laughing).
The suck! Becca has been fine the first couple days. She came home from work Friday more tired than usual so I'm thinking "here we go" and then...that's it. Nothing more just tired. She ended up going to bed around 8pm. I think partly because I kept asking how she was. I'm trying not to do that honest I am ;-).
Today is just a little worse as she woke up a little nauseous. As she puts it feeling pregnant during the first couple months. Lots of rest and water. Oh yes water! Tons of the clear cool liquid which she has found she has to sip because chugging is no bueno. Dehydration is a problem but she's managing nicely. I say this mainly because of her wonderful co-workers who raided a pantry I think and has thus far given her 4 HUGE TJ Maxx bags, you know the ones that you could fit a small fridge inside, yeah those, filled with jello, gatorade, broths, pudding, water, jello, crackers, candy, jello, books, magazines.... did I mention jello? I had to go out today and get a cheap 4 shelf stand alone for all the overflow of pantry items we don't have room for. I poke fun but it really is so very kind of them.
The benefit page is going well with almost 2500 in donations which is just astonishing. I lowered the goal and feel really good about getting to that point. It really helps and takes some of the worry out of the noggin so I can worry more about her. She's reading this so that is why I say it lol. So please keep sharing. Especially with people in a higher tax bracket. Still waiting on that anonymous donation from a millionaire who just wants to help people. Ever see Indecent Proposal? Yeah nothing like that. However I would think about selling myself if need be.
So there you are my little gumdrops. That's the skinny, the 411, the downlow on Becca. Till next time and remember to dance like no one is watching you (but they really are...and laughing).
Some might remember the Blue's Clues reference from a previous post ;)
Thursday, February 6, 2014
Toxic Avenger
Started chemo today. LOTS of questions she has to answer prior to actually having a treatment. It's gonna get a bit repetitive. Also before every procedure, no matter if it's the same doctor or nurse, she is asked her name and birthdate. Now I understand the need to make sure you are giving treatment to the right person but c'mon.
Blood draws happen each time she arrives and before treatment to make sure her system is good to go. Everyone is very nice and patient. Her port looks good with little to no swelling as well as little bruising. Becca has been very calm and collected. Her attitude has been stellar and positive.
The gals here at the clinic get our humor about all this so that rocks! Each treatment should take only 2-3 hours and she should feel fine afterwards and the next day (probably) as well. Saturdays will be the day she may or may not feel like crap warmed over. Repeat 3 more times over the next few months.
Got some pictures here of her first day at chemo school :
Numbing the port site
Needle is in
Getting saline and anti nausea medication
The "Red Devil" chemo treatment
Home now and everything is fine. She had lunch, took an anti nausea pill as directed and rinsed with a baking soda and water solution to help prevent mouth sores. Thanks so much for the well wishes and for stopping by and catching up on us.
Tuesday, February 4, 2014
My Little Oompa Loompa
Didn't have time to get this out today until Becca was in bed. Been keeping an eye on her and trying to keep her being up too much. She's stubborn. The power port went in without a hitch. She has some stiffness and reduced range of motion in her neck but that will pass in a couple days. And of course she came out looking like a deranged oompa loompa from the beta-dine. Hard to get that stuff off.
YUP
On a financial note I have good news! Going through our insurance again (cause I never fully understand that crap) I found out that while our deductible is very high our total out of pocket is not much higher! Which means that the fundraiser I started will have it's goal reduced. When I stared it I had no idea what would happen but now we are looking at 15-20K over the next 2 years. I'm stoked about this!!
I wish I had more to tell you but there's not much going on. I'll be back on Thursday and let you all know how she did her first day. Stay safe everyone and thanks for dropping by!
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